I have had a rough time of it since the beginning of this year, but God has proven Himself faithful again and again, constantly. He is leading me, teaching me, comforting me, lovingly disciplining me, providing for me, and forever showing me His perfect love.
Few people ask to go through trials in life. I definitely don't. But we all must walk through them anyway at times during our earthly journey. Oh, how I haven't wanted to endure these last few months and the next couple of months, yet how else could I possibly see God's hand at work as clearly as I can now? It is unmistakably evident that He has had and continues to have a plan in all of this. He has at least one new daughter that I'm aware of who came to know Him because of circumstances surrounding my surgery last month. My silly little surgery (my first ever!) that I was so worried about and was discouraged that it had not been as successful as hoped . . . until I heard about my new sister in Christ, whom I've never met, yet have this freaky-in-a-good-way connection with. My pity party was over instantly and was replaced with excitement and re-focus on the fact that none of this is random, I'm not being picked on, and God is working mightily!
Now, I am not looking forward to this upcoming surgery anymore than anyone else would be. And I'm probably even less enthusiastic about the long recovery afterward. It drives me CRAZY to sit around and do nothing. Did you hear me? CRAZY!!!! (See? I'm already showing signs . . .) I panic sometimes just thinking about it all. But, you know the conclusion I come to every time when I reign in my thoughts? There's a reason! It's good. Not easy, but good. And then I almost look forward to seeing what God has in mind. What will He teach me? How will He work? Something's up, and I'm beginning to anticipate finding out what it is!
Speaking of ample offers of help, people are so kind. I've been showered with kindness all throughout the past months and have been so blessed. The care of my son during my upcoming surgery, meals provided, so many encouraging words and cards and helpful advice, and, most importantly, the support of so very many faithful prayer warriors. Whenever Kevin and I have gone through a dark or troubled time in our lives, the kindness of God's people is so extra-evident, shining through like the brightest of lights. We are so grateful to everyone who is touching our lives in these different ways. If you are one of them--thank you from the bottom of my heart!
If you are going through a hard time, hang on! God has not dropped you from His hand, and He definitely has a good reason for allowing difficult circumstances in your life. Don't be afraid! One of my favorite verses lately, one that I've heard a million times but has once again taken on new meaning for me is:
"Do not fear for I am with you; Do not be dismayed for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." Isaiah 41:10
"Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, because the Lord your God goes with you; He will never leave nor forsake you." Deut. 31:6