Of Hysterectomies and Un-Spring Cleaning

So, I have a hysterectomy scheduled for the near future. The reasons are various and serious. That's all the detail I will be going into here on this public blog, but if you know me and have questions, you're welcome to ask . . . and I will probably answer. ;)

I have had a rough time of it since the beginning of this year, but God has proven Himself faithful again and again, constantly.  He is leading me, teaching me, comforting me, lovingly disciplining me, providing for me, and forever showing me His perfect love.

Few people ask to go through trials in life.  I definitely don't.  But we all must walk through them anyway at times during our earthly journey.  Oh, how I haven't wanted to endure these last few months and the next couple of months, yet how else could I possibly see God's hand at work as clearly as I can now?  It is unmistakably evident that He has had and continues to have a plan in all of this.  He has at least one new daughter that I'm aware of who came to know Him because of circumstances surrounding my surgery last month.  My silly little surgery (my first ever!) that I was so worried about and was discouraged that it had not been as successful as hoped . . . until I heard about my new sister in Christ, whom I've never met, yet have this freaky-in-a-good-way connection with.  My pity party was over instantly and was replaced with excitement and re-focus on the fact that none of this is random, I'm not being picked on, and God is working mightily!

Now, I am not looking forward to this upcoming surgery anymore than anyone else would be.  And I'm probably even less enthusiastic about the long recovery afterward.  It drives me CRAZY to sit around and do nothing.  Did you hear me?  CRAZY!!!!  (See?  I'm already showing signs . . .)  I panic sometimes just thinking about it all.  But, you know the conclusion I come to every time when I reign in my thoughts?  There's a reason!  It's good.  Not easy, but good.  And then I almost look forward to seeing what God has in mind.  What will He teach me?  How will He work?  Something's up, and I'm beginning to anticipate finding out what it is!

So, this whole recovery time thing brings me to the subject of "Un-Spring Cleaning."  What IS un-spring cleaning, you might ask.  Well, it's my abridged version of spring cleaning this year.  It's kinda like spring cleaning, but not really.  For instance, today I "worked" on the bookshelves.  I had intended to take all the books down as usual and give the shelves a good cleaning.  Then I got real.  I simply don't have time for that this time!  And it's going to be okay!  Yes, I just took down the other things on the shelves (you know, candles and other decorative things), cleaned the shelves on any surface that books don't cover, and called it "fine."  Really--how much dust gets under those books anyway, right?  My theory right now (and this is with a lot of coaching from loving friends and family who I've had to admit are right!) is that anything I don't get done before surgery and recovery will still be there after.  I have ample offers of help for things that need to continue to be done during my convalescence, but my blinds will still do their job whether or not I clean them now or in the summer.  Know what I'm saying?  I actually almost believe this!  I'm learning well! ;)

Speaking of ample offers of help, people are so kind.  I've been showered with kindness all throughout the past months and have been so blessed.  The care of my son during my upcoming surgery, meals provided, so many encouraging words and cards and helpful advice, and, most importantly, the support of so very many faithful prayer warriors.  Whenever Kevin and I have gone through a dark or troubled time in our lives, the kindness of God's people is so extra-evident, shining through like the brightest of lights.  We are so grateful to everyone who is touching our lives in these different ways.  If you are one of them--thank you from the bottom of my heart!

If you are going through a hard time, hang on!  God has not dropped you from His hand, and He definitely has a good reason for allowing difficult circumstances in your life.  Don't be afraid!  One of my favorite verses lately, one that I've heard a million times but has once again taken on new meaning for me is:

"Do not fear for I am with you;  Do not be dismayed for I am your God.  I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."  Isaiah 41:10

                                                                          AND

"Be strong and courageous.  Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, because the Lord your God goes with you; He will never leave nor forsake you."  Deut. 31:6

Motivation Simplified--Part 2

Now, as I mentioned in my last post, some of the household chores can and should be delegated to others who live in the home, especially if those others are children.  If you read my post on "work" awhile back, you know my thoughts on teaching our kids to work.  Dave Ramsey, the financial expert we all recognize from one form of media or another, had this to say in the January/February 2011 issue of Thriving Family magazine:  "Kids need to start learning the virtues of getting a little dirt under their fingernails at a young age.  Making kids work does not constitute child abuse.  Child abuse is letting them lie around playing video games and munching chips all the time!"

So, how do you know which jobs to assign to which child?  Well, no one knows your child like you do.  You have a pretty good idea what they are capable of and what they are responsible enough to do.  Some six-year-olds might be more responsible with an electric vacuum cleaner than some twelve-year-olds.  As they gradually mature, gradually give them jobs that require more responsibility.  Most children want to mature to the next level of responsibility.  It's a sense of accomplishment for them.

Even a toddler can learn to work when a parent hands him a cloth and asks the child to dust the furniture alongside the parent.  There's no reason a toddler shouldn't be expected to put away toys, even if it's with some assistance. 

In the world of adults, work normally has a payoff.  A paycheck, a clean house, the satisfaction of a job well-done.  In fact, if an adult doesn't work, there are negative consequences of some kind.  Why not teach our children this concept?

Younger children often like chore charts with stickers.  And it's even better when there's a bigger reward for completing a predetermined number of days/weeks worth of work--a special treat, an inexpensive toy, getting to watch a certain DVD, etc.  One thing I used to do with Little Mister was to have my "bag of tricks."  It was actually a Target bag filled with inexpensive items I knew he liked, and he earned them.

Now he's "much too old for stickers, Mom."  :)  Instead of a chore chart, I purchased an index card binder, with appropriately sized dividers.  It's divided into morning, afternoon and evening chores.  Each index card has a chore and when he completes one chore, he can flip the card and see what's next.  Actually, there are many cards in there that aren't what you would classify as "chores," but they are reminders of the daily routine--down to things like "brush your teeth."  It helps my energetic boy stay focused! ;)

The items in his book that are truly "chores" earn a "commission."  Not much per job, but it does add up!  Some things he has to do without being paid, to teach him there are some things you do just because you're part of a family, part of a household.  Anyway, the commission is his "allowance," which then we are teaching him to manage.

Simplified motivation is great for kids!  Organizing and rewarding their chores around the house doesn't have to be complicated or expensive.  For the little ones, you can print charts here or here.  An index card binder for older kids can be found at Walmart in the office supplies aisle.  Something completely different might work for you.  Use your imagination! :)

We do, of course, need to be careful not to overload our children.  Giving them jobs we don't like to do isn't exactly the point, either.  Balance, as in most things, is the key.

Motivation Simplified

Raise your hand if you're busy!  Ah, yes, I see lots of hands!  Aren't we all busy?  And sometimes it's a challenge to work everything important into our schedules and have it all done well.

Now, let me ask you this.  Do you like to have your home in order?  Or at least clean?  Personally, I like to have a place for everything and everything in its place.  Not everyone in my house is at the same extreme in his mindset as I on that matter, so some days I do settle for "a place for most things and most things in their places."  Occasionally, illness overtakes us or we over-schedule ourselves and, for a brief period, it's "a place for some things and some things in their places!"  I must admit that drives me crazy!

But whether you're more comfortable with everything in its place or a few things scattered around, we all want a basically clean house.  I found a perfect-for-me system to help stay on track in this area and wanted to share it in case it might be a perfect-for-you system, too!

It's called Motivated Moms, but don't let the name mislead you!  Anyone who has housework to do can benefit from this.  Basically, it's a chore chart for grown-ups. :)  No stickers, but checklists.  It breaks down a year's worth of housework into very doable daily lists.  There are some things they suggest you do every day--things you probably do already, like clean out the sinks in your home and sweep the kitchen floor.  It even reminds you to take your vitamins, exercise and pamper yourself!  Gotta love that!

Then, each day you have a different list of things to do.  Some things you do on the same day each week.  Some jobs are broken down into small segments.  For instance, one day each week, you're cleaning a part of your refrigerator.  One week, you clean the first shelf, the next week, the second shelf and so on.  Once you've made it through the entire fridge, the next week will start over on the first shelf again.

I started using this last year and have found it so incredibly useful!  It reminds me to do things I might not think of, like clean the mouse on the PC.  The housework is broken down into such manageable segments, that it's not a heavy burden on any day, usually.  Often, my only time to do housework is when Little Mister is doing independent work for school, and I can usually get my chores done in that amount of time with no problem, some days with time to spare.  A mom with younger children could accomplish the list during the kids' nap time, or someone with a job away from home could manage the list before and/or after work.  It just makes sense!

You might choose to add to the list of everyday chores (there's room to do that) or if, for you, something they suggest doing every day doesn't need to be done that often in your household, you change it to work for you!  And, of course, some of the chores can be delegated to other members of your household.

Anyway, I drastically simplified my time organization for this year.  Last year I used the Keepers at Home organizer and, while it was nice in some ways, it was just too complicated and time-consuming to repeat this year.  Now I have the monthly tabs from last year and behind each tab, I have that month's printed calendar, with the holes punched on the "wrong" side (right-hand side of the paper), and then I print out the current week's "Motivated Moms" chart, holes on the left side, so when my planner is open, I can see both pages (calendar and chore schedule) at once.  My appointments go on the calendar, and the things I need to accomplish that week are listed on the appropriate days of the chore sheet.

I like the price, too:  $8, plus the cost of paper and ink to print it.  I use both sides of the paper, printing a week on each side.  When you pay for it (via PayPal), it loads on your computer and you can print it out a week at a time, or however you wish. To see samples and sizes and/or to order, go here.

P.S.  I'm not being paid anything to tell people about this. I just like it! :)

Edit (1/1/12):  You can get this as an "app" as well this year, if that suits you better!