My One Thousand Gifts

I've taken the challenge to think of 1,000 (and beyond) things to be thankful for.  To read what this is all about, read my previous blog post here.

1. The one and only true God:  Father, Son and Holy Spirit
2. The Bible
3. Kevin
4. Little Mister                                   
5. Family
6. Friends
7. Forgiveness
8. Home education
9. Many moments, fleeting as they are, with my son
10. Crockpot meals
11. Cell phones
12. Cozy house
13. Large windows through which to gaze upon the seasons of creation
14. White daisies in winter
15. Liquid sunshine of oranges
16. Candles flickering
17. Bible study
18. Second chances
19. Good music
20. Family mealtimes
21. Family prayer
22. Family devotions
23. Cozy winter evenings
24. Warm clothes
25. Heat of the furnace
26. Bread machine to make the dough
27. Giggling girls
28. Strings of white lights
29. Scrambled eggs
30. The library
31. Sales at a store
32. Penguin pajamas already too short for growing legs
33. Always enough
34. SGC
35. Fluffy white rice
36. Crispy green salad
37. Mechanical pencils
38. Christmas carols whenever
39. Good workouts
40. A chivalrous husband
41. A helpful son
42. Computer keyboard for my fingers to fly over, expressing thoughts
43. Date night
44. Family game night
45. Laughter
46. Accountability
47. Netflix streaming
48. Rain's pitter-patter
49. Opportunities to help my son grow, and to grow sometimes myself in those times
50. Bottles of toilet bowl cleaner that can eventually be opened
51. Restored relationship between mother and son, when both have erred
52. Refreshing, healing tears
53. Wisdom freely given by God
54. Sweet, tangy pineapple
55. Tylenol/Ibuprofen
56. Fresh-smelling laundry
57. Crumbly toppings
58. Redemption
59. The of hope of spring
60. Focus
61. Hair products
62. Warm to hot showers
63. Fluffy pillows
64. Boy being diligent
65. Nerf gun darts found in funny places
66. Our big lug of a dog, Theo
67. Lego creations
68. Solid, trustworthy neighbors
69. Child's newly cleaned room
70. My girlie red Bible cover
71. The calming of anxious thoughts
72. Theo's amusing howls at the tornado siren tests
73. Mild winters
74. Memories
75. Furrowed brow of boy pouring over open Bible and concordance
76. Happy songs of sweet little birds
77. Sweet-but-not-too-sweet blueberry buckle
78. New, fresh days with no mistakes in them (yet)
79. Check marks
80. Best effort
81. My white board wall in the school room
82. Bursts of warm golden sunlight
83. A comfortable toothbrush
84. Husband or son whistling cheerily
85. Son ready for spelling test
86. Wisdom and fun to "like" on Facebook
87. Photographs, old and new
88. Father-son time--precious to see
89. Newborn babies
90. Liberty
91. Stars in the clear night sky
92. Texting
93. The light at the end of the tunnel
94. WoW Connect! writers
95. Flexibility
96. Chattering of busy squirrels
97. Clinking of clean plates stacking in the cupboard
98. Wintery pine scent of flickering candle
99. Post-it notes
100. Laughter after tears
101. Medical advances
102. Chick flicks
103. Warm gloves
104. Helping someone figure things out
105. Pinterest--Oh, the ideas!
106. A balanced budget
107. Cartoons for a sick boy
108. Possible snow
109. Fixed mistakes
110. Kind words spoken
111. Valentines for Mommy, lovingly created by 9-year-old boy's hands and heart--does it get any sweeter?
112. Composers of old
113. New hands to play the music
114. An unexpected treat dropped off for sick boy
115. Healing
116. A library full of life stories, real or imagined, free for the reading
117. New recipes
118. Old recipes, handed down through generations
119. Light snowfall against midnight sky
120. Sound of Daddy reading to son
121. Surprises to plan for my guys
122. Heart message on paper
123. Quiet afternoon--son studying, candle flickering, God's Word saturating my heart and mind
124. Far-away friends--memories carry me through the missing of them
125. Kay Arthur--such a wise and strong example, helping to bring the Word into focus
126. Dear son's opening heart
127. Love poems from husband
128. Celebrating, even in the mourning, a precious life lived for Him
129. Boy hunched over microscope, discovering the mysteries of the world
130. Comforter on our bed lopsided because sweet son surprised me by making it for me
131. "Grampy Bumps"--when one person high fives while the other knuckle bumps
132. Finding and listening to CD I forgot I had
133. Changes
134. Kevin's strong hand grasping mine across the table
135. Date Night Challenge
136. New friends
137. The testimony of one grieving in the comforting arms of Jesus 
138. Family game of Twister--hilarious!
139. Comfortable silences
140. Deep questions
141. Always more to learn
142. The sound of precious son writing song lyrics to the Lord
143. The day after a disappointing election.  The golden sun still rises.
144. That God is still in control
145. Fluffy scrambled eggs for breakfast
146. Light of all kinds
147. Warm November days to get the Christmas lights ready!
148. Jesus, Jesus, Jesus; sweetest name I know
149. My husband of strong character
150. My sweet son, sho toddled into my life at just the right time
151. God's never changing, always life-filled Word
152. The family of 7 I grew up with on Elm Circle Drive
153. Elim
154. Miss Margaret
155. My brothers-in-law--best brothers I ever had! :)
156. My loveable nieces and nephews
157. Photos--capturing memories
158. My family-in-love
159. Friends, old and new
160. Saturdays!
161. Music:  songs of praise, a chorus of birds, a great band, 80s music, the crooners of old, a child's laughter, a symphony orchestra, a favorite hymn, a powerful pipe organ (thanks to Dad)
162. Warmth
163. Memories
164. Quiet moments
165. A day set aside to give thanks
166. Extra long weekends
167. A washer and dryer
168. A weekend family getaway
169. An anticipated phone call
170. Chores that keep us humble
171. Feeling better after being sick
172. A new opportunity
173. The chance to grow
174. Grace
175. Mercy!
176. A kiss on the cheek
177. The antics of 10-year-old boys
178. Legos
179. Decorating for Christmas
180. Finding the perfect gift
181. Christmas sales
182. Christmas baking with LM
183. The book of John
184. Puffs Plus
185. Cousins
186. Sleepy yawns at night
187. Family reunions
188.  

The Thanksgiving Tree

I would love to meet Ann Voskamp.  Her influence on me this past year, through her book and ministry, has been such a huge blessing.  It was she who gave me the idea to start this Thanksgiving Tree this month to help my family focus on the many, many blessings for which we are grateful.  I had to share it with you because it's such a great idea, and it works!

Just go outside and gather a bunch of sticks, arrange them in a vase, then go here (takes a minute or two to load) and print and cut out the leaves.  Each leaf has a colorful side with a Bible gratitude verse and a blank side for you to write what you are thankful for.  We read the verse and our own written part together before hanging it on the "tree." 

I think it's meant to be one leaf per day, but I see no reason to limit it to that if we can think of more blessings in a day!  I just scattered the extra leaves around the bottom of the vase, and will print out more when needed.

The month is half over, but it's not too late to start this project for your home, whether your household contains you alone or lots of people or somewhere in the middle!  We all are blessed in so many ways, it's probably not too difficult to think of at least 2 blessings a day to "catch up" by the end of the month! :)

 

To be Laurel

Mountain Laurels

If you didn't know me as a kid, you might not know that "Laurie" is not my given name.  My name is "Laurel."  You know, like the mountain laurel flower.  One of its meanings is "victorious."

I didn't realize at first that my name was different.  For the first several years of school, I was known as "Laurel," and, except for these twin boys in second grade who teasingly called me "Laurel and Hardy," I never thought anything about it.  I was probably in 5th grade or so when I realized I was the only "Laurel" I knew.  It suddenly mattered.  I didn't want to be different.

Different seemed like the worst thing in the world.

Everybody at home called me Laurie.  Laurie I could handle.  I knew some other Lauries and, of course, there was Laurie Partridge.  So thus began my struggle to become "Laurie" instead of "Laurel."  Teachers mostly wanted to call me Laurel since that's what was written on their attendance sheet.  Many of my classmates had known me since Kindergarten as Laurel, and, you know, old habits die hard.  It was easier in Jr. High because we merged with another school, so there were scads of kids who would know me from the start as Laurie.

For a brief period I changed the spelling to "Lori" because I thought that looked cooler.  I even sometimes signed my name "Lori the Great," not because I thought it was true, but maybe because I wanted it to be.  I think by the time 8th grade came around, I was back to Laurie.  But, still, it was Laurie, not Laurel . . . an outer manifestation of what was going on in my heart.  I didn't want to be different in any way.

The other day I was conversing with a sweet 9-year-old girl as we baked cookies together.  She is a well-read, well-spoken, and quite a poised 9-year-old girl, I must say.  We talked about being different.  She feels different in her interests; and her classmates, in her perception, see her as different.  She doesn't enjoy the resentment she sometimes senses from others over her different-ness, but, wow, she is determined to embrace those differences and not cave in to the temptation to conform to others' view of "cool."  She quoted from books the inspiring words she has read and memorized about what one can accomplish when she is okay with being different.

I wish I hadn't wasted my time at her age.

Naturally, I'm not talking about the kind of "different" that rages at God and the world and seeks to rebel against what is true and right.  No, no, no.  That kind of different is not to be succumbed to.  The good kind of different is that of unique, God-given qualities that have a purpose--through which He can do His work.  A person who can embrace his/her individuality can deeply touch and affect the lives of those who aren't afraid to interact with different people.

Think of all the potential that is wasted when people care only about conforming in order to avoid ridicule.  

Being Laurie became a habit.  From high school to college to my locations after marriage, I've just been Laurie.  It's automatic.  I almost forget I have a "real" name sometimes.  In recent years, I've contemplated going back to it, but it's too complicated to ask people to change my name in their minds after all these years.  If we were to ever relocate, I might consider starting off fresh with Laurel.

But a name isn't everything.  On the inside I'm becoming a Laurel.  I'm not so concerned about being cool or acting like everyone else.  I don't go out of my way to offend people, but the Lord is the One I want to glorify, not myself or a certain group of people.  It's okay now if people don't agree with me.  It's okay to be different . . .

. . . to be Laurel.

Sad Eyes

I saw your photo the other day.

A beautiful smile!

But sad eyes.

What's behind them?  What pain do you try to hide?  What can I pray for?  How I can help?

Would you ever dare to tell me?  Or someone?

May the Lord heal your heart and bring the light back to your eyes, my friend.

Healing Rain

Oh, how we have needed rain.  For weeks and weeks our community has watched as the parched earth around us has cried out with its brown crispness, almost audibly pleading with the Lord along with us to replenish its moisture with rain.  Some of the trees have lost their will to stretch their hands toward the heavens and have instead withered limply, seemingly giving up hope.  Word has it that some farmers have contemplated (if they haven't already done it) tilling under their crops and starting over, with the hope of having a late harvest of something instead of nothing.

The songs "Let it Rain" and "Healing Rain" have come to mind a lot in recent weeks.  It's hard to know sometimes what the Lord has in mind when he bestows or holds back.

But we know He loves.  Provides.  In HIS timing.

Yesterday we got a little rain.  Last night we got A LOT!  This morning we got even more!  Never has thunder sounded so wonderful. :)

Little Mister, naturally, wanted to go out and play in the rain.  How in the world could I say no to that?  Heck, I wanted to join him!  Of course, it looks a little more dignified for Mom to be playing outside with a camera in her hand, right?  (wink, wink)

A rain dance, I guess.  IN the rain! :)

I adore the pure boyish joy of this pic. :)

 Rain after a drought is as refreshing to the human soul as it is healing to the parched ground and all that live in and because of it.

A pair of old, grubby shoes is a must to have around for my boy.

About to stomp, I'll bet!

 

Happy are the grubby-shoed feet of a boy outside on a rainy day! :)

Always a stick in hand.  Always something to explore . . .

. . .  because only those with their eyes open will find a "treasure" like this!

A cicada shedding its shell is the perfect thing to observe on a summer afternoon!

One night and morning of rain is probably not enough to restore all the damage of drought in our community, but it's plenty to heal the thoughts of doubt that it will ever rain again.  It's enough to lighten our spirits and renew our hope!

Changed into flip-flops at some point. :)

Mud . . . it's a wonderful part of childhood.

Summer Laughter

How do I explain the laugh fest I had with my son this morning?

We laugh all the time, but today was different.

Today I wasn't in a hurry to get on to the next thing.

I'm trying not to spaz about nasty work gloves on face. ;)

Today I took the time to just immerse myself in the moment . . . and allow it to turn into moments (plural!).

Today I let myself laugh wholeheartedly.

Today I fully took in the sight of his laughter--tear drops clinging to his never-ending eyelashes, some escaping in a path down his cheek;  the smile that stretches 'til it just cannot reach any further into his cheekbones; the tilting back of his head as he gasps for air.

Today the sounds of his laughter delighted my ears and lightened my spirit, like the most joyful of music.

I always love to laugh and to see others laugh, but laughter on a relaxed, lazy summer day is the best! :)

Content with Today

I'm 44 years old today.  When I was 4 . . .

 . . . and even 14 . . .

 . . .  birthdays were an exciting prospect!

I would say that now I pretty much forget about my birthday until a couple of days before, and then I anticipate it with a pleasant content.  I know my guys will insist on my not doing any housework (I didn't even make my bed this morning--hubby did it for me!), will take me out to dinner or make me a special meal, and will buy me the little frivolous things I don't think to want or ask for at any other time.  I always know, too, that I will celebrate with my dad (whose b-day is the day before mine) and any other family members who are around.

It's just all very pleasant!  Nothing to be all hyper about like when I was a child, and nothing to despair over like I temporarily did when I was turning forty.

Content.  It's a nice place to be.  Whatever I regret from the past, whatever I waste my time fearing in the future . . .

. . .  today I am content with today.

Savor the Moment!

Excitement is definitely in the air!

 No, it's not the last day of school. In fact, while everyone else is celebrating the final days of this academic year, we are completely aware that we won't be done until mid-June.  But the reason is worth it!  We've been able to take time off when people come to visit, and we've had lots of fun visitors during this past school year!

Now we're taking ten days off (after today) because we have more fun visitors arriving! :)  My sis, Mary, and her daughter, Zoey will be arriving from Ohio around dinner time, I believe.

Then tonight, my sis, Amy, and her husband, Mike, and their two kids, Emily and Zack, will be arriving from Arizona!

Next week, my Aunt Linda, Uncle Dave, and Mary's hubby, Scott, will join us, and then my sis, Julie, her husband, John, and their three kids, Hannah, Shane, and Danny, will be here!  And my sis, Betsy, who lives relatively close to me, will be around for the various festivities as well, no doubt.  My parents, who live in town, will be hosting the adults, and I think the kids are staying here (based on the number of sugar cereal boxes in my house, we'd better have some extra children here at least some of the nights! lol).

It's always exciting to see loved ones, far or near.  The one thing that can put a damper on having my faraway kindred spirits near is the dread of saying goodbye again.

I am so un-fond of goodbyes!

And Little Mister absolutely falls apart immediately after saying goodbye to his cousins.

But I'm trying to learn something from my Little Mister.  This tough-but-tender-hearted boy of mine makes the most of every second, until that heart-breaking moment of goodbye.  He doesn't waste time dreading it or really even thinking about or dwelling on it.  He savors the now.

Oh, yes, that's what I want to learn to do, and I'm about to get some more practice:

Savor the moment!

This "Holy" Haunting . . .

I've been haunted so much in my life.

I'm not referring to spectral beings. Oh, no, no, no.  That's for someone else's blog. ;)

No, I'm talking about a haunting of the mind and heart.  Memories of stupid things I've done; emotions needlessly relived; details laboriously rehashed.

I have the choice in those matters, so I guess in those cases I'm haunting myself!  Silly, huh?  Counterproductive, to say the least.

But then there's the kind of haunting that I have no control over.  The kind that sneaks up on me when I least expect it . . .

. . . because I thought it was OVER!

But it's not.

By "it," I mean a certain situation.  In this case, it was supposed to be behind us.  God walked us through it.

Last year!

He taught us so much through it.

Last year!

We made it through the deep, deep pain and injustice.

Last year!

We were content to keep it there . . . in the past.  In 2011.

But it's come back to "haunt" us.  Much more him than me.  It's my dear husband who has to relive "the incident" in its entirety, meticulously putting his memories into words more than a year later, knowing that there will likely be attempts at twisting his words to mean something they don't.  (I love that word "attempt" when it comes to evil intentions--they can "attempt" all they want, but will only be successful if God, in His supreme and loving sovereignty, allows it.)

My husband is so much stronger than I.  His faith is solid.  He experiences peace so much more easily than I do.  But this situation he's facing is not easy for him.

And what weighs on him weighs on me.  Our lives, our very souls, are so intertwined that there's no way for me to wall up my heart and avoid the emotions welling up in me.  I don't think I really even want to do that.   I can't bring myself to abandon him on any level, not even to escape my "share" of the emotional burden that he is able to handle so much better than I.

So emote I must.  It's probably good.  I'm starting to realize these emotions have been lying dormant for months.  It makes sense.  An event, a long-lasting trial in one's life, does not just go away when the victory happens, especially when such tragedy is the source of a far-reaching event.  It touched so many people's lives in so many negative ways.  It was so useless at its beginning, yet God used its ramifications mightily for good.  How does He do that?

Is He in "the haunting," too?  God, please say You are still involved, still working behind the scenes.  Please say You will take this ridiculous man-made echo of the past and redeem it somehow.  Please allow hurting hearts to find true healing in You, not in their hateful acts born of their pain, regret, and misleading influences.

Yes, God is in this.  I know He is.  I can't help asking, "Why, Lord," though.  I mean, the stakes aren't as high for us personally now as they were last year, yet it's still a huge deal in ways I can't mention here.  God could have allowed it not to come to this.

Why didn't He stop it?

I don't get it.

But, oh, the joy I feel when I think of how I know HIM, the One who has His reasons.  His reasons are always good!  I can trust that!  This life with Him is far more exciting than any story I could read or write.  Experiencing what I have with Him allows me to, momentarily here and there, see past the pain and the anxiety and wonder what wonderfully awesome thing He will accomplish through . . .

. . . this "holy" haunting.

The Blessings of Family

Wow!  It's been a long time!  We have been busy with projects around the house (and always will be!), and last week we had the delight of a visit from our Washington kin. :)  Kevin's sister, Elizabeth, and her husband and son, Paul and Brent, came and spent some relaxing, conversation-filled days with us during Brent's spring break, and it was so refreshing and fun to spend time with them.  It had been three years since we had seen them!

Where is the time going?

 

Our boys have grown so much.

 

But, in some ways, it's like time stood still.  Love is like that.

My stunning sis-in-law and Little Mister, sharing a moment. :)

What a great, God-loving, fun family they are! :)

Besides a lot of just hanging out and talking (catching up!), we did a lot more just hanging around. :)  We went to parks, picnicked, drove around Amish country (where Brent had his first Rise-n-Roll donuts and Jo-Jo's pretzel!), and the boys climbed our trees and played in Little Mister's digging area.

We had a make-your-own-pizza night, where everyone got to be creative on my "rustic-looking" (ha ha) homemade crusts.

Hey, they tasted better than they looked--ha ha. :)

Lots and lots of Dutch Blitz was played by all!  It was so fun to break out this classic again. :)

There's just nothing that compares with time spent with family.  What a joy and a blessing last week was for us! :)